I didn’t realize until I was pregnant just how important birth stories can be. I googled and read story after story, hoping to gain a little bit of peace as I neared 37, 38, 39 weeks. I didn’t do a whole lot of birth prep because I didn’t want to think about it. I just told myself that my body will do what it needs to do.
I know now that there is way more that goes into birth mentally and physically. But if you are someone like me and you haven’t done all that prep, I want to share my story in hopes that it will encourage you to step into your labor with peace.
I had a fairly normal pregnancy. I say that because although my baby was healthy and on track the entire time, I had morning sickness and struggled to keep food down the entire nine months. I took zofran, medication to ease the vomiting, from nine weeks along until the morning of my induction. So by the time those last four weeks arrived (the ones that feel like four years), I was over it. My mindset became: whatever it takes, just get this baby out! As I said, I didn’t do much research with my first regarding labor, so I was open to induction. Whatever it took to not be this uncomfortable anymore.
We went in for my 40 week appointment. At 39 weeks, I had been dilated to a 1 and was 70% effaced. I was now barely 2 centimeters but 80% affected, so we knew my body was making some progress. We got to the point in our appointment where she asks if we have any concerns. I told her how I had been feeling different movements from the baby. Not less, just different. Almost like he was so tight in there he was struggling to move at all. So she decided it would be a good idea to check his movement and fluid levels via ultrasound. All of his movements were normal and frequent, but my fluid levels were insanely low. I was measuring at a 7 on a scale of 5-25 (I know, such a strange scale to measure by). So with that information, she suggested that we induce as soon as there was an opening. If we waited too long, either the baby or I could get a severe infection and we didn’t want to take any risks. I was beyond ready at this point to meet him and have him out of there. So we agreed. The next induction date was at 6:00 AM the next morning!
When I heard that, I felt like my world was spinning. It just didn’t feel real. The whole pregnancy, you feel your baby move and squirm and take up space. You know they are real, but when she told us just how soon we would get to meet our son, I felt shocked. I called my mom when we got home to tell her to get on the road and then finished packing my hospital bag. I couldn’t believe I was finally going to get to hold my baby in my arms!
That next morning, June 6, we checked into the hospital and they got me prepped in the room where I would be delivering. Pitocin was the induction route that was advised, and even though it was the quickest method, we knew it could still be another day before I’d deliver. I was so dehydrated (due to being so sick the whole time and one of the reasons why my fluid was so low) that it took three nurses and 4 different sticks to get the IV in properly. I was told no more food, just light liquids from here on out. Pitocin started at around 7:00 AM. It was go time!
A few hours passed by as I bounced on a yoga ball, walked around, and played some games with my mom and husband. I could feel the contractions, but pain hadn’t kicked in yet. My midwife did another cervical check and I was only at a 3.
A little tip for soon to be mamas: the cervical checks were so terrible. My cervix was sitting very high and behind where the baby’s head was. Every time they had to check it, they pulled it forward which was pretty excruciating. I had maybe five checks total. I tell all this to say if you don’t want a cervical check, you probably don’t need to get one. Most aren’t necessary since they don’t really give any clear timeline of labor. They hurt and sometimes tend to be an unnecessary intervention. But to each their own!
Anyways, more time passed and my contractions picked up in intensity but still were not too painful. By 5:00 PM I was dilated to 5. They suggested breaking my water to get things moving faster. I knew that I did not want my water broken until I had an epidural so they administered that to me around 8:00 PM. When they were breaking my water, they had a hard time grabbing the amniotic sac because there was no water left at all. The cushion of water that normally forms under the baby’s head and breaks open to release water was just not there. This caused the hook to actually scrape my baby’s head (but he was totally fine). Finally they broke it, but no water gushed out like you see in the movies.
Hours kept passing as I slowly progressed. I had intense shakes the whole time which made it incredibly hard to relax, even with the epidural. I was able to take a short nap, and when I woke up, the midwife did a quick check. I was dilated to 9.5! When she said this, I just started sobbing. My hormones were all over the place, I was running on no sleep, and my body was physically exhausted. Tears ran down my face, and for a second I kept thinking that I couldn’t do this. But my husband and my mom reminded me that I was built for this. Just a little while longer, and I was going to meet my baby!
It was around 2:30 am when I was ready to start pushing. I laid on my back while nurses and my husband held my legs in the stirrups. After about an hour of pushing alongside the contractions, I started to get nauseous. I threw up a few times between surges. Another forty minutes and he was still stuck above my pelvis and having a hard time descending. So we switched things up a little. One of the nurses grabbed a sheet, and she and I played tug of war for a few more surges. I’m pretty sure that’s what helped him get down under my pelvis! At this point I was just so exhausted that it was hard to focus and use my strength. My midwife gave me a quick pep talk to get my head back in the game. She reminded me that I can do this. He was coming and the harder I pushed, the sooner I got to meet him!
A little while longer, nearly two and a half hours total, and his head finally crowned. The pressure was insane, but no pain (thank you epidural!). When his head was finally out, I felt the most amazing sense of relief. My emotions started coming back as well, and tears streamed down my cheeks. I breathed through the next contraction, gave a small push, and he was finally here!
My biggest dream came true at 5:01 AM, June 7. They laid all 8 pounds 1 ounce of him on my chest, a moment I know I will never forget. I was in love.
He did not cry when he came out and was extremely limp, which caused my mind to race in fear. Everyone kept reassuring me he was okay. He had just been in the birth canal for so long that he had a lot of fluid still in his lungs. While the midwife stitched up my second degree tear, my baby was being given a bit of oxygen to get him breathing better on his own. I finally got to hold him again and see his sweet face. No one could have prepared me for the love and awe I had for him.
Over the next couple hours, I was feeling nauseous from the medicines and pain from the epidural wearing off. But the afterpains, the contracting of your uterus to help it shrink down, were unexpectedly awful. All the pain meds had worn off at that point, and all I felt was stabbing pain and crazy pressure. I couldn’t sit still, but I also couldn’t walk yet. So for another hour I laid there crying in pain until the nurse finally was able to give me tylenol. That, by far, was the worst part of the whole birth experience.
Eventually, the pain subsided enough that I could hold my sweet boy. Those quiet hospital moments with just my husband, my baby, and I will hold a special place in my memory. Looking back on my birth, there are things that I wish would have gone differently. But God’s plan was for my baby to come in that exact way. He knew all the ups and downs, and he was with us through it all. Birth is intense and beautiful, just as he designed it. Positive hospital birth experiences are not talked about as often as the negative ones. I hope this birth story encourages another mama out there.
